


i'll fight for you

by ofsinnersandsaints



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Canon Divergent, F/M, Fjorester, angst and fluff and hand holding, fjord dies but it's just temporary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:00:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23925010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ofsinnersandsaints/pseuds/ofsinnersandsaints
Summary: The Mighty Nein are fighting a dragon for ReasonsFjord dies, because he's a selfless himboJester saves him because of course she doesHand holding, beaches, and kisses
Relationships: Fjord/Jester Lavorre
Comments: 1
Kudos: 76





	i'll fight for you

**Author's Note:**

> i started writing this ages ago, before Fjord died on the show, and I think this is a nice soothing balm and a little bit of what we wish we'd gotten

Shit.

Shit, fucking, shit-balls.

Fjord would ponder later that his internal voice still had a bit of twang to it, but for now he was focused on the pretty blue body which was currently not moving some thirty feet on the other side of the cave.

Caduceus was too far away, but Fjord knew he could do some good now; the only down side was the dragon between himself and Jester, but fuck that.

He pushed away from the stone and ran as fast as he could across the stone floor, and when the dragon swiped at him he tried to duck out of the way but the thing was so massive it’s giant claw easily scraped down the side of his arm.

Fjord could feel the warmth of the blood dripping down his arm, leaving a trail of red drops in his wake. He could feel how weak he was now, but he’d deal with it later. Jester was the priority.

Dropping to the ground beside her Fjord put his hand on her sternum, and thanked the Wildmother Jester was still breathing.

Not dead, not yet.

“Let me help her,” Fjord began pleading- _praying_ , he corrected himself. It wasn’t pleading when you knew someone was listening, when you knew someone cared. “Please, let me help her.”

He focused on the injuries he could see and the beat of her heart beneath his palm, the rise and fall of her chest with each breath. “Open your eyes, Jessie. Let me see your eyes.”

Beneath his hand the rich green magic accumulated and spread across her chest and Fjord thought about how little power he still had, but it would be enough to keep her alive and when it came to Jester, he’d always give his all.

The magic faded and Jester inhaled sharply, her eyes opening.

“There you are,” he smiled when his gaze met hers. “Sleeping on the job, Jester?”

“It seemed like a good time to take a nap,” she teased back, her hand reaching up to touch his which was still pressed against her body. She sat up and looked over at the dragon who was staring at the space where a crossbow bolt had come from. Fjord knew Veth was somewhere in the shadows, but even he couldn’t see where she was.

“Shit, my spiritual weapon is gone,” Jester grumbled as she sat up. Her hand still holding his. “Are you okay?”

“I’m right as rain,” he lied, keeping his left hand out of her line sight. “You better heal yourself.”

She nodded and with a shaky hand reached down to clutch the symbol hanging from her skirt and the bright purple magic swirled around her and he watched the paleness of her skin darken as the color returned. “Okay, I’m better now.”

Fjord nodded as a blast of energy shot from Caleb’s hands a second before Caduceus sent a wave of healing through the group. A wisp of sound came from his right and from the dark a flash of something silver in the air before the dragon snarled. In the darkness came Veth’s voice, “Take that motherfucker!”

The dragon took a swipe at the darkness and there was a small screeching noise, but half a second later Beau appeared, and climbed up the dragon, using her staff to bash the creature on the side of the head. It never ceased to amaze Fjord how a single person could do so much damage. Near the dragon's foot Yasha was raging with her terrifying sword.

Feeling a little better, Fjord stood up and twirled his wrist to send his sword singing. “Ready to get back in it?” he asked Jester, but didn’t wait for an answer as he ran up to the beast and sliced through dragon scale and muscle.

The howl of pain and anger terrified the shit out of him, but he stood his ground as Jester’s lollipop appeared above them and then smacked the dragon hard on the head with it.

The rest of the Mighty Nein took their swings in turn until there was a quiet rumbling.

Fjord looked down automatically, expecting to see the pebbles below him rattling on the stone floor but they were perfectly still. It was then Fjord realized the sound was coming from above him and watched as the dragon took a few steps back and opened it’s wide mouth from which a blast of something acidic forced it’s way from throat to cavern and Fjord tried to dive out of the wave but he still wasn’t used to the way his body had changed.

He stumbled and felt the full force of the acid hit him, the feeling unlike anything he’d ever experience before as every inch of his body burned with a sizzling sound.

Fjord groaned and automatically dropped his sword, the weapon disappearing the instant it left his fingers, as everything he had left him. His knees hit the ground and the heel of his palms scraped along the rough stone and the pain kicked in that little thing he had from whomever had born him.

From one second to the next everything went from dark silence, to raging noise and light. He was unsteady as he came back to the land living, but he managed to throw out a couple shots of eldritch blast while he was still on his knees and could see Jester out of the corner of his eyes, her hand stretched out in his direction.

There was a purple haze over everything for the briefest of moments; a gift from Jester at fifty feet away.

He stood up, it wasn’t much she’d given him but it was enough to keep him going for now.

Fjord tried to keep track of what was happening but he was barely able to stand up; he saw flashes of magic and the roar of a dragon.

This time when the acid hit him, he didn’t feel it.

Everything just immediately went black.

Jester screamed when Fjord hit the ground.

Beau swiped at the dragon as she ran towards the cleric, and in response the black wings beat in the small space throwing both Beau and Fjord’s bodies across the cavern. Jester helped Beau stand up but she was already pulling away and grabbing Jester’s shoulders tight enough it hurt. “You have to get him out of here.”

Jester blinked at her friend, then looked to Fjord’s body. “I have to heal him.”

“You have to get him out of her,” Beau repeated. “No matter what you do, the dragon can take him out again. You have to get him out of this cavern.”

Jester nodded, knowing Beau was right, and ran towards Fjord. “I’m going to take care of you,” she promised, hearing how shaky her own voice was. “Let’s get out of here.”

She wrapped her hand around his and whispered to the Traveler, the doorway opening up beneath them, and together they fell through and landed on the soft moss of the swamp outside the cave where the rest of their friends still fought.

“Fjord?” she asked after she cast another heling spell. “Fjord?”

But he didn’t wake up.

“No,” she said, the tears streaking down her face before she finished the word. “No. No, no, no, no.” She checked his pulse and couldn’t feel anything, and it was then she realized his chest had stopped moving. “Fjord!”

Jester fumbled through her bag to pull out the diamonds and placed them on his chest. What would have happened if they didn’t have the gems? A whole life, bereft of Fjord, flashed through Jester’s eyes and she could feel her heart squeezing desperately in her chest.

“Traveler?” she whimpered. “Wildmother?”

She needed to finish the spell, knew she had to do more than just place the diamonds and whisper a few words.

Jester had to pull him back from wherever he was.

The fear that he was with Uk’otoa, that she wouldn’t be able to get him back from the fuckface terrified her, but she’d fight for Fjord.

There was warmth around her, something more than the humidity of the swamp, and then the Traveler was sitting across her on the other side of Fjord’s body. His mouth a grim line from under the cloak.

“You know what to do,” the Traveler told her.

Jester nodded and brushed back the hair along Fjord’s temple. He needed a haircut, she realized, the thought a soft thing in the chaos of her head. “You have to come back Fjord,” she told him, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I don’t know how to do this without you. I don’t want to know how to do this without you.”

Following instinct, she leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his forehead, to his cheek. “You’re mine, Fjord Tustktooth, and you’re not getting away from me that easily.”

There was a heavy silence, between the beats of her heart, but it was enough for Jester to panic.

Then Fjord’s hand tightened on hers a second before he inhaled sharply.

With a shriek laid her body on top of his in an attempt to hug him and Fjord’s hand awkwardly patted her back. “You okay?” he pulled back, shifting in her embrace so he was sitting up but her arms still wrapped around his shoulders. “Hey, are you crying?”

“You died, Fjord!” she yelled, punching his arm.

“Ow, shit. That explains why everything hurts.”

She laughed, the sound a little hysterical to her own ears. “I asked if you were okay, and you lied to me. I should have healed you sooner.”

Fjord shook his head. “No, Jessie, you needed to heal yourself. If you’d gone down, I couldn’t have brought you back-dead? You’re sure I was dead?”

Jester settled next to him, her hip touching his, as she studied his face. “I’m really, really sure Fjord.”

He seemed to study her face, his hand reaching up to brush away the drying tears on her cheek. “Sorry, didn’t mean to do that.”

She nodded and didn’t resist the urge to lean into his touch. With eyes closed she soaked up the feeling, “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do that again.”

“I’ll try,” he rested his hand on her shoulder, his fingers brushing against the strands of her hair. “Thanks for saving me. You’re my hero.”

“That’s what we do,” she reminded him cheerfully, trying to push away all the fear and terror she could still feel creeping around the edges of her heart. “We save each other.”

_“DID YOU SAVE FJORD BECAUSE WE’RE RUNNING FROM THIS DRAGON BECAUSE THE CAVE’S GOING TO COLLAPE DON’T ASK WHY. YOUCANRESPONDTOTHISMESSAGE.”_

Jester furrowed her brow as she answered Veth, “Yes, I saved Fjord. Are you coming to us?”

_“WHERE ELSE WOULD BE GOING? YOUCANRESPONDTOTHISMESSAGE.”_

“Veth?” Fjord asked as he stood up, taking Jester’s hand and pulling her along with him.

“Yeah,” she kept her hand tight in his, not quite ready to let go and needing the reminder he was alive and with her. He squeezed her hand once as if he understood. “The cave’s collapsing apparently. She didn’t say why, but I think it’s going to be a quick escape.”

“Anything we can do to help?”

“I don’t think so.”

Their five other friends came running out of the cave, Caduceus carrying Veth in his arms while she screamed. “We’re safe now,” Caduceus was saying and he patted Veth on the head. “You can stop yelling.”

“This is my regular voice!” she shouted even as the big man set her down. “Why do we keeping running into dark places with dragons, this was a terrible idea.”

“We’ll keep doing it as long as they have stuff we need,” Beau answered, looking relieved when her eyes landed on Fjord. “Oh, thank the gods. You’re okay.”

“Thanks to Jester.”

“And Beau,” Jester piped up. “It was her idea to get you out the room.”

“Thanks, first mate.”

Beau’s smile was small but full of everything. “Anytime, Captain.”

“We’re getting out of here,” Caleb announced. “But I’d like to get away from the mouth of this cavern as it will take me a minute to draw the circle.”

“Down the hill,” Fjord decided and everyone started following the small trail down away from the cave entrance.

Jester realize a couple seconds later she and Fjord were still holding hands, but she wasn’t about to be first one to let go. She snuck a glance over at him and he looked pale, his feet almost dragging along the dirt. “Are you okay, Fjord?”

She saw the moment he thought about lying, but he shook his head instead. “I might go unconscious again if a bird looks at me wrong.”

Jester laughed and took Sprinkle off her shoulders and put him on Fjord’s. “There, Sprinkle will you protect you from birds, and I’ll protect you from everything else.”

Fjord laughed and tugged on their joined hands, and together they walked down the mountain together.

The group made it down the mountain safely so Caleb could send them back to Nicodranas where they would be able to figure out exactly what the object they’d just risked their lives for actually did.

While Caleb hid in his room with the item, Beau went to meet up with someone from the Cobalt and Veth spent some much needed time with her family. Caduceus said something about tea and no one asked any follow-up questions, but Yasha did go with him.

Fjord found Jester in her room, looking at it was always such a weird experience for him. What must it be like to always have a place you could go back to? This was the room Jester had grown up in, and even as an adult who could save the world, she still had a place in her mother’s house. “Hey, Jester. You busy?”

She looked up from an orange she had place on her desk. “Nope, Mama’s working so I was just practicing my tattooing. What’s up?”

He shifted on his feet, tried to be more confident than he actually was. “I was going to go for a walk, would you like to join me?”

“Oh!” She looked a little flustered but smiled and put down her things. “I’d love to.”

Together they walked out of the house and were silent for a few minutes as Fjord tried to figure out the words he wanted to use and how to say them.

“Are you okay?” she asked, and he almost smile at the burst of sound coming from her. He wondered how long she’d been trying to hold them in before they’d broken through her sealed lips.

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?”

“You’re being very quiet,” she answered as she looked at him. “Not that you talk a lot, but it’s a very intentional silence.”

“Do you mind if we wait till we get to the beach?” he asked and she nodded.

When they got to the sand they both sat down and began pulling off their boots. “Shit, I always think I make up how good the sand feels, but every time…”

“It is pretty great,” she agreed, shoving her boots into her bag and then taking his and doing the same. “Is it the dying thing? Is that why you wanted to talk?”

Leave it to Jester to skip over the easy stuff and go straight for the heart.

“No,” and figuring this was as good a place as any, he settled on the sand and picked up Jester’s hand. “It was the coming back to life part.”

She was quiet, but she shifted closer so her arm was pressed against his. It was weird how used he was to no physical contact, every time Jester touched him or grabbed onto him it was a shock to him while it seemed so casual and normal for her. And yet, he was constantly terrified she’d take it away.

“I saw her,” he finally said. “The Wildmother, I mean.”

“Oh!” her smile was bright and warm. “That’s wonderful! I was worried you were going to see _him_. Did you?”

“No.” He’d been afraid of that too, but thankfully the sea monster who owned a part of his soul had not been around, but Fjord had felt him. But he didn’t want to think about that and looked down at their intertwined fingers, a green and blue pattern that reminded him of mountains and rivers. “But I heard you.”

There was a rush of red beneath her cheeks, giving them a little bit of a purple hue. “Oh.”

“You should know, I’d never try to get away from you.”

“It was stupid-“

“Hey, it wasn’t stupid. We’ve both had a lot of people who walked away from us, so it’s not out of the realm of possibility. But you should know, the only reason I’d ever leave was if I didn’t have a choice.” He paused and seemed to add as after thought, “Which I did.”

Her eyes narrowed with confusion. “Did what?”

“I had a choice,” he answered carefully. “The Wildmother said I didn’t have to go back, if I wanted peace I could stay with her. It was fucking beautiful, Jester, and it was calm. So calm.”

Jester’s face remained carefully neutral, but she couldn’t control the look of hurt in her eyes. “You wanted to stay?”

“I thought about thinking about it,” he admitted. “Then I heard you, and nothing compared to hearing you say I was yours. Not even heaven.”

Her eyes were wide and her mouth was parted a little in surprise.

“I like the idea of being yours, Jester. And I wonder if maybe, on the off chance, you’d be okay with being mine.”

This time Jester’s smile was a little amused. “Didn’t you know, Fjord? I’ve been yours for a long time. I was just kind of waiting for you to realize.”

And he kissed her.

There on the beach where they both came from, with the sound of the water a familiar sound in their ears, the ocean breeze a caress on their skin.

“You’re not allowed to die anymore,” she told him, brushing her nose with his. “But if something happens, I’m not letting you go without a fight.”

“Right back at you, Jester.”

He kissed her again, and the place he’d always known suddenly became a kind of home.


End file.
